It's APRIL! Wohoo!

Harlo


Let's start our April with..

Skyping with Nana! Hahaha. Omg and today is Aina's birthday! Too bad, I can't go back to Jb. Ma's fault -.- Anyway, Aina if you're reading this (lol incase okay), I just wanna say that I love you. More than everything, you my lovely doll. Please break up with your boy really soon, coz I'm gonna be single soon. Ops.

What else should I say? I hope April will be a really good month for me. Oh come on, it's April. Lol I actually don't have any issue or sweet memories in April. So yeah Barlo, eveghyone. Muaxx

Happy Saturday!

Harlo


Seriously, haha I don't even know what the fuck am I doing right now. I am supposed to complete my Addmaths but end up with Youtube and Tumblr. Ma went to Bangkok and maybe she is comng back tomorrow so I'm the one who did all the chores in this house. I'm exhausted babe. Need more air! Ahh.


I do actually have a few posts to be posted really soon. Hihi just for myself. I blog about it, and stalk myself after publish it. Yes, I'm the stalker of myself. Yes, what a sad life I have. 





I'm soo gonna support this event. Even, just in my room. Sigh

I vow to help you love life, to always hold you with tenderness and to have the patience that love demands, to speak when words are needed and to share the silence when they are not and to live within the warmth of your heart and always call it home.

I vow to fiercely love you in all your forms, now and forever. I promise to never forget that this is a once in a lifetime love. I vow to love you, and no matter what challenges might carry us apart, we will always find a way back to each other.”

Harlo

It's 02 am right now and I'm still wide awake. Listening to Foster The People and reblog almost everything on my dashboard, now this is what I called as calmness. 

Lol. I don't even know what to blog.. Hm. I'm actually having my so-called 'red flag' this week. So, everything is kinda turned upside-down because I'm being so dramatic and emotional bitch. Aha. Cried with no reason at all. Yep, I cried almost every night. Something is really wrong with me, don't ya think so?

I think too much and urgh.. omg it's really killing me. The feeling of being sick, but I'm not really sick. I'm just sad, unhappy and upset. I just feel like laying in bed all day. I need a vacation. A long vacation to somewhere. Somewhere like Bora-Bora, maybe? Hahaha Bora-Bora is not a good choice but yeah somewhere like that. Just me. Alone. 

Everything is so stressful right now. My monthly test didn't went so well. Failed in Physics. I feel stupid.. Oh, and I didn't get to participate in netball. That sucks, maaaan. And my relationship with Azrin is starting to fade away. No sparks between us anymore. To be honest, I'm not ready for someone new in my life right now. Of course I feel happy everytime we hang out but the feelings are just temporary. I feel empty. Completely empty. I love being in love. Feel like everything is possible, right? But for now, I need my own space. A big space for myself. 

But hm I'm trying my best to keep myself happy and busy so that I won't think my problems too much. I mean, oh come on, I'm sixteen. I know that I shouldn't think too much. I should just enjoy my teenager's life and be happy just like other normal people. We'll see if there will be any changes in my life, next month or next week or maybe ya know, tomorrow or something?  Kan?

Alhamdulilah for everything xx barlo

My Love

It's amazing to have someone that you can call at midnight, and just talk about your interest, your favourite band, everything. This boy makes me happy. Well, not really. But at least, I'm not as sad as I used to be. The best thing is, we can talk about our favourite band, Foster The People, for like an hour. I don't care if his face is not charming enough, but for me, he's perfect. 

I'm not sure if this relationship can stays forever, but my boyfriend and I know, that we share something, something that only both of us can feel. I can feel  the sincerity between us. This boy is so cool. So calm. So cute. So funny. Thing I love the most about him is, his sleepy voice. Such a major turn on for me.

I love being in love. Feels like everything in this world is possible.

Barlo

Too Insistent

I know that I shouldn't let my past to control me, but sadly, I did. Yeah, I did. These negative thoughts of my boyfriend cheating on me, got F in my exams, not being good enough, not being pretty enough, not being smart enough are killing me. I literally have to shout and cry just to shut these shits down. 

Obviously, me, myself is the main problem in my life. I take things too serious. I feel lonely eventhough I have Azrin, my family and my friends. I feel bad to Azrin. He miss me but I don't make any effort to meet him. Well actually, I've tried. But uhm I don't know. Long-distance relationship is hard for me. 

It's hard.